10: Don’t drive too aggressively or become openly aggravated with other drivers. A first date is a time for both people to give a good first impression and losing your temper over any situation will be a “giant red flag” that will send her running in the other direction, away from you. A woman admires a man who doesn’t allow him self to be walked on by other people but handles himself with dignity and who can adjust to make the most out of a frustrating situation. To be alone with a woman is a privilege, and she has put her trust in you that although you may be bigger and stronger than her and she doesn’t know you very well, you’re a safe person and will look out for her best interest. On a first date, showing hostility towards others or your date will make her feel as if her safety could be compromised. It is also a tell tale sign of the kind of behavior you will exhibit in the future of the relationship toward her and or your future children. You will be very unlikely to get a second date.
9: Don’t order food that contains veal, lamb or tuna. Women are sensitive creatures and as such many women are aware of and have deep compassion for animal rights issues. While the woman your are going on a first date with might not be vegetarian, that doesn’t mean she is not sympathetic to animals and the political issues that surround them. Veal, lamb and tuna all have controversy that surround their consumption, so it’s best to take precautions and not offend your date by consuming these animals on your first date.
8: Don’t discuss politics or religion. The old cliché is true. A discussion of religion or politics does have a chance of creating a deeper connection between the two of you, but is actually more likely to create a first impression of incompatibility. Religion and politics is a conversation best saved for future dates.
7: Don’t get drunk before or during your first date. I completely understand that you may be nervous about going out on a first date with someone you are very interested in. Making a first impression can be a very tricky thing and you are thinking that if you just have a few drinks before the first date it will relax you, take off some of the pressure and enhance your personality in ways that will help you to make a good impression. It’s just not a good idea. The more likely scenario is that you will make a fool of yourself and not be on your best behavior, resulting in no second date. Having a couple of drinks or sharing a bottle of wine with your date during dinner is fine, but tying one on before or during the date is not, especially if you are the driver.
6: Don’t talk about past relationships, dates or break ups. A first date is an unique opportunity to start something new. Of course you have a past and so does your date. However, for the two of you the first date is a fresh start. A first date is a symbol of a possible future and any mention of previous relationship issues bogs the two of you down in your past. Hopefully both of you have learned lessons from your past relationships and dating experiences. A first date and a new relationship is the time to use these past experiences to help you not make the same mistakes again. A woman likes to feel special as if she is the only one for you, talking about the ex bursts that bubble. Once you get to know each other better, you can bring up past relationships.
Sometimes on a first date you will find yourself straying onto this topic of taboo conversation as you are recounting a funny story that happened to occur while you were together with a girlfriend. At this point you should remember to refer to this person as your friend, not girlfriend, and definitely don’t name names. Let’s imagine you accidentally say, “One time my girlfriend Hillary and I…” You must know this will taint the name Hillary for her for a long time. Women always remember these things and if you do end up becoming serious with this person, the name will haunt her into eternity. You may be talking about Hillary Clinton, but she will be thinking about Hillary the ex-girlfriend.
5: Don’t discuss your medical problems. While you should always be honest and disclose any transmittable STD’s you may have to your partner before you have sex, the first date is not the time to disclose any medical condition you may have. If your lucky enough to get a second, third, fourth date, there will plenty of time to get into the harsh realities of life such as medical conditions. The first date is a time to focus on your attributes that are positive, not the time to tell someone that you are positive. As a general rule, anything that makes you cringe when old people talk about it should not be a topic of conversation on a first date (Ex.: Illness, bowel movements, the medication mix up at the local pharmacy, your recent doctor visit).
4 : Don’t flirt with the waitress and don’t look at other women. I cannot emphasize this enough guys. When out on a first date a woman wants to know that you are interested in her and that you find her attractive over other women. One way to let her know this on a first date is not to let your eyes wander. If an attractive woman comes into your view let her walk by and focus on your date. This is sort of ogling behavior is a pet peeve of women and you won’t do it if you want that second date.
3: Don’t be pushy or controlling. Being pushy or controlling on a first date is a huge red flag for women. Many women have had abusive relationships before and are looking to avoid a relationship with that sort of guy at all costs. This doesn’t mean you should be a wishy washy pushover. Just remember that no means no. If she says no to your restaurant or movie choice or doesn’t want a drink with dinner, respect her decision.
2: Don’t make racist or homophobic comments. Aside from just being plain rude and ignorant this sort of behavior is totally unacceptable on any level and especially on a first date. These days everyone has close friends and relatives that are gay and span all the colors of the rainbow. Don’t make assumptions about your dates background, you never know where someone comes from or who is in their family tree and insulting your dates friends and family members is a sure way not to get a second date.
1: Don’t give up too much personal information. A first date is not a therapy session. Do not discuss topics such as your bad relationship with your mother or your the fact that your dad left when you were a kid and now you are mentally damaged for life. You want her to get to know your personality not your problems.
(For more dating advice please visit my AC content page to view more of my articles on this and other topics.)