Tough guys come in all shapes and sizes, all races and backgrounds, yet they all follow certain rules in order to be as tough as they want to be. Use these tips, and maybe you too can enter into the elite world of tough guydom.
Rule # 1 Tough Guys Never Smile
Never, ever smile if you want to be a tough guy. Tough guys never have anything to smile about. Smiling is for little girls and pansies. If you ever feel the urge to smile (which you shouldn’t) try to suppress it at all costs. But if the semblance of a smile manages to break free of the stiff façade that should be your face, manipulate the awful thing at once. Make it smaller, pretend that you’re biting your lip, or turn one corner of your lip upwards into a smirk. Smirks are what every tough guy should have in his arsenal.
Rule # 2 Perfect The Tough Guy Style
Because tough guys come from all walks of life, there’s tons of looks that a tough guy can adopt. There are three very popular tough guy styles however.
The first is the hip-hop tough guy. This guy usually adopts leather jackets, baggy jeans and t-shirts, sunglasses that he wears at night, and lots of expensive but gaudy jewelry made from platinum and diamonds (nothing says tough like big diamond earrings).
Then there’s the rocker tough guy. This guy usually likes more form fitting clothing (nothing says tough like tight jeans); he usually prefers leather pants, wife beaters, sunglasses that he wears at night, and the color black.
There’s also the typical tough guy. He usually dons a wife beater, track pants, spiky hair (nothing says tough like hair gel) and waxed eyebrows.
As you can see, there are countless versions of the tough guy style, so be creative just don’t forget that leather, the color black, wife beaters, and unfounded rage makes truly makes this look complete.
Rule # 3 Workout
Tough guys need to look tough. No one’s going to take you seriously if you only weigh a buck ten or you have a beer belly. So pump that iron to get a rock hard body built for intimidation.
Rule # 4 Eat Meat & Potatoes
Meat & potatoes are manly foods, fruits and other vegetables are too girly. If it was good enough for John Wayne, well meat and potatoes are good enough for you.
Rule # 5 Smoke Cigarettes
What can be tougher than a man with black lungs and a hacking cough?
Rule # 6 Don’t Address Women By Their Names
What’s the point when mami, baby, shorty, ma and other demeaning names are readily available? Nothing says tough guy more totally disregarding a person’s identity and giving them a new one.
Rule # 7 Adopt Tough Guy Behaviors
Being a tough guy involves adopting an icy stare, a permanent scowl, and folded arms. It also involves spitting as often as possible, even if you don’t need to. If you’re not willing to do so, well, why don’t you just run off in a field full of daisies and lilies? You pitiful wimp, you disgust me.