Do you admire the bubbly self-confident people? Do you want to be one of those individuals who always seem to know what to say and can freely talk to anyone and everyone. Well you can be! Here is your guide to being a confident, friendly, social butterfly that everyone will enjoy being around.
Change Your Attitude
When you walk into a room your body language immediately tells everyone in that room what attitude you brought with you. If your shoulders are slumped and you avoid eye contact people will avoid you the rest of the evening.
Before you walk into a party, stop and check your attitude. Decide right then and there that you are happy to be here and that you are the guest of honor. Now walk through the door like you own the place! Plant a huge smile on your face, throw your shoulders back, and take in the whole room. Find a few friendly faces to make eye contact with and then boldly walk up to the host or hostess and thank him or her for the invitation.
Have Something to Say
Now that you have set the tone for the party and shown to be a friendly person. You will need to have something to say. Use your new found confidence, even if you don’t feel confident, to start or continue a conversation. The hottest topics will most likely be local and national news.
Use a open ended question to start or continue a conversation. Try not to ask a question that can be answered with just yes or no. Use questions like, “Any predications on tonights Packers game?” or “Do you know many of these people?”
Want to make someones evening? Find someone who is standing alone and approach them. Start up a conversation with them, remember they are probably feeling just as shy and self-conscious as you. By the end of the evening you will have made a new friend and you will have helped someone else build their confidence!
What Not to Do
There are a few things not to do with your new confidence. Avoid complaining or talking about others, this only makes you look bad. Don’t discuss sex, religion, or politics. These are topics best left for developed friendships. Never bring up or joke about your shortcomings or failures, it only makes those around you uncomfortable.
Most of all you want to avoid one word answers. Short answers will give the impression that you have nothing to say or that you are not interested in the topic of conversation.
It’s ok Not to Know
Don’t be afraid to say you are unfamiliar with the topic. If someone asks you a question about something that you are unfamiliar just say something like, “I’m sorry, I am unfamiliar with _____. Please tell me more.” No one expects you to know everything and by admiting that you know nothing about the topic you give the other person(s) a chance to teach you something new. By using statements like, “That’s interesting, please tell me more.” or “Keep talking, this is interesting.” you can have a nice long conversation and before you know it you will be at ease and you truly will feel more confident!