U2 IS IN THE HOUSE!
Hey AC Readers! What’s up? Are you ready to partay?
My name is Will Pinn, and you are here with me “live” in my living room. Today I will be doing a live review-uncut and uncensored(sort of)-of the U2-The Best of 1980-1990 CD. I will be describing my impressions of this CD from the time I take off the shrink-wrap to the final track.
Again, this review is brought to you “live” with no past tense and no commercials.
THE BLOODY SUNDAY SHRINK WRAP
Lets see…I’ll use the fingernail of my thumb…Ugg! That’s no good! Why do they have to make shrink wrap so hard to get off? Trying a kitchen knife. There…got it started…now I’m ripping off the shrink-wrap.
I don’t own any other U2 records, tapes or CD’s. So you might say I’m a U2 virgin-I’ve fantasized about their music but never experienced it up to this point. OK, I heard their stuff on the radio-but that’s all–I swear.
Pride: This tune has clean, crisp guitars playing a jackhammer rhythm. No Morley pedal fuzz-balls here. The bass and drums will rattle your windows and sliding glass door. You should see my windows and sliding glass door, right now! Whoa! I must say, Bono really ties one on vocally here. I think I’ll rate this tune five stars.
♫One man come in the name of love
One man come and go..
.In the name of love…
One more in the name of love…♫
Oh shoot! (AC censored my true exclamation.) I just stepped on the CD case! It is made of durable plastic because it did not crack or break. Let’s see what happens when I throw it against the wall…whoa! it broke that time.
New Years Day: This track has a kick-down-your-back-door beat! Awesome! The guitars do more hook fills in this song. My windows are still rattling. Bono is showing off his vocal prowess on this one too-FIVE STARS.
♫All is quiet on new year’s day…
I want to be with you night and day…
I will be with you again
I will be with you again…♫
Well AC readers, I’m kinda hungry and have no food in the house. So I am gonna head to the Stop N’ Rob convenience store to pick up some munchies. They got this new snack food called Kudos I wanna try.
I will continue to bring this review to you “live” with no past tense and no commercials.
With or Without You: While I drive my truck to the Stop N’ Rob I will listen to this CD on my walkman. Hey, this song has an interesting intro. The guitars sound like bells running on a hamster wheel. The beat reminds me of a landlord banging on the front door trying to collect overdue rent! Stratospheric tenor vocals by Bono on this track. Cool! I’ll give this one five stars too.
♫With or without you…
With or without you…uh huh…
I can’t live…with or without you…♫
I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For: That about sums up my life. LOL! The intro of this song has a multi-guitar jam that sounds like a clockwork mechanism. Then the rhythm section joins in and embellishes that same clockwork mechanism. Bono is singing his butt off as usual. Five stars, please.
But I still haven’t found what I’m looking for…
Fortunately, I am able to find what I am looking for here at the Stop N’ Rob.
One quart of milk [beep]…one loaf of bread [beep]…one box of Kudos [beep]…one case of beer [beep] and one gallon of gas. That’ll be $99.95.
Sunday Bloody Sunday: This song is painful for me to listen to. It has a very raucous arrangement. The band sounds like my washing machine when the bearings were shot-kind of a loud grinding noise. I’m gonna rate this one star.
Sunday…bloody Sunday…(skip to the next track)
Bad: Uh oh…another bad track? Hey, not bad. Nice guitar intro…lots of picking…a heart rhythm beat. This song is somewhat of a ballad. I like the way the fiddles play tag with the guitar fills. Bono shows off his falsetto range. I give this one four stars.
♫If you should ask maybe they will tell you what I would say…
If I could…you know I would…If I could I would…
Let it go…♫
Well, I’m back in my living room again munchin’ on some Kudos and havin’ a beer (belch). Excuse me. The next track is-
Where the Streets Have No Name: Shouldn’t the song title be “Where the Streets Have No Names”? Oh well. Here’s a nice change of pace: a pipe organ nucleus with electron guitars whizzing around it. The beat and music of this song would make a great background for a Ferrari ad-where the high performance auto is streaking up the road with the pedal to the heavy metal! Five stars? Yessss!
♫I want to run…I want to hide…I want to reach out and touch the flame…where the streets have no name…♫
I Will Follow: This song has the signature jackhammer guitar rhythm. It has a kick-down-your-back-door beat! Bono’s vocals are kinda Johnny-one-note, though. Four stars it gets.
♫I will follow….run away…walk away…I will follow…♫
(Ding dong…) Excuse me a moment, Epinion readers, someone’s ringing my door bell (ding dong…).
Hey Will, how’s it going?
Good, Mike, how about yourself?
Not so good. My toilet is backed up. Do you mind if I use your bathroom?
Not at all; help yourself.
The next song on this CD is called “I Can’t Find the Key to the Bathroom Boogie.” Hehehe! Just kidding.
The Unforgettable Fire: More like the “forgettable fire.” It has a typical U2 arrangement, but the song is more like a cover song than a hit song. I give it three stars.
Sweetest Thing: Electric piano? That is a nice change from the usual guitars. It is too bad it is a bubble gum, Johnny-one-note song-two stars.
Desire: This song is a kind of campy vamp rock review show tune. Well at least it has a harmonica. Yawn. I give it two stars.
When Love Comes To Town: I wish love would leave town! This song is painful! It has a raucous blues jam-but even the most depressing blues music is more cheerful. I rate it-
Thanks for letting me use your bathroom, man.
You’re welcome, Mike, anytime.
Whatcha doin’, dude?
Oh, reviewing a U2 CD.
Really? They’re alright I guess. Thanks again.
Well, there you have it, Epinion readers-my friend Mike’s biased opinion. Could you ask for anything more? How about:
Angel of Harlem: This one reminds me of a Bob Dylan song because of how the guitars are EQ’d. The beat is sure and steady. Bono is singing in a more impressive range. I give this one three stars.
All I Want Is You: First this ballad takes a trip to acoustic guitar-ville. Then synthesizer eagles fly overhead as Bono’s voice fills out the middle like a raging river floods a dry gorge. How about four stars?
♫You say you want diamonds and ring of gold
You say you want your story to remain untold…
When all I want is you…♫
Well there you have it, AC readers. My totally “live’ review of this CD. Overall, I rate this CD four stars.
The CD booklet contains great black and white band photos. There are no songwriting credits (though I have heard that the whole band contributes to writing its songs), and no song lyric sheets for you sing-along types-so memorize the words, OK?
Have a good one! I’m outta here!
Bono-vocals, guitar and harmonica
The Edge-guitar, keyboards and vocals
Adam Clayton-bass guitar
Larry Mullen-drums and percussion
Pride (In the Name of Love)
New Year’s Day
With or Without You
I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For
Sunday Bloody Sunday
Where the Streets Have No Name
I Will Follow
The Unforgettable Fire
When Love Comes To Town
Angel of Harlem
All I Want Is You