When we’re little girls we think about want daddy wants, but once we’re grown up we tend to switch to what we want from men. In all honesty we pretty much want to be worshipped. Women are known for expecting too much. A friend of mine has a man who struggles with his pay checks. Once in awhile he brings home a thousand dollar check and she’s still not content with what he has to offer. She either needs to get her own job or lay off her old man. Putting a man down over what he earns will only hamper his career development. My friend’s husband refuses to worship her, because she is not worshipping him.
If you’ve got a man whom you care for ladies encourage him to advance in his career. Of course, if he has no ambition don’t push it. You’ll either have to accept him as he is or let him go. After all, if you wanted a rich man you should have married one. You only have yourself to blame. Also, don’t expect him to give you what you should be giving yourself. There is nothing wrong with being a stay at home mom and certainly putting a man’s career first is nothing to be ashamed of at all. However, if it bothers you that he isn’t climbing the ladder to success maybe you should concentrate on your own career goals. Sometimes, we project our insecurities onto other people. There’s nothing wrong with putting a man’s career first if that’s really what you want to do. Think about it. While
you’re at it consider whether or not what you want for him is what he wants for himself. Don’t waste your time trying to control someone’s elses career goals. You may find what you’re really unhappy about is your lack of success rather than his lack of ambition. When he sees you trying hard to make your dreams come true he may find himself inspired.
When a man works hard all week he doesn’t want to come home to a wrecking crew. You don’t have to put it in his face what he’s doing wrong at work. His co-workers are no doubt doing that for you. So, how should you react to a laughable pay check? First of all, any progress should count in your eyes. If the last several paychecks have been pale and he comes home with a little extra green celebrate. Don’t break the bank by spoiling yourself. Instid give him the gift of appreciation. Smile when he announces how much he made this week. It’s alright to discuss the bills and mention the bills are still behind, but don’t yell at him for bringing home more money than usual even if his checks still might not be enough to cover all the household expenses. He will feel defeated and the last thing you need when you’re in a tight spot is a man who feels he can’t possibly make you happy on account of money troubles. Many times women hold men back with negative attitudes of their own.
How can you increase your man’s net worth? Well, you’ll have to be sure you’re not throwing good money away. The first year of our marriage I bought all my clothes at garage sales until I figured out to shop sensibly elsewhere. My husband and I were dirt poor for at least eight years. We didn’t even get taxes back for the first seven years. How can a love survive when the electricity is getting shut off and the water’s not running? You make love a lot cause it doesn’t cost anything. Many couples who face finacial crisis make the mistake of either spending too much on each other over the holidays or spending nothing at all. When Valentine’s Day rolls around decide how much you’re willing and barely able to spend on each other. You may choose to split a twenty dollar bill buying each other cards and candy. Don’t feel guility as long as you give a little and not too much more than you can afford. The cost of the gift shouldn’t matter when you love someone and they love you back. You’re right in thinking you deserve holidays even if you’re struggling finacially. However, don’t try to live beyond your means.
What if you’d like to see him advance in career and he’d like to advance in his career? It’s always important to know the man you’re married to… really know him… his insecurities… his talents… his limitations and so on. Listen to him carefully when he talks about work. Remember, you’ve got to be on his side if you want him to make progress. You may not be interested in auto mechanics, satellite repair, welding or whatever it is he does for a living. However, you knew what he was into before you married him unless he’s recently changed careers entirely. When your spouse has a problem you shouldn’t concern yourself with what you to talk about all the time. You may not even know what he’s talking about when he brings up his job, but he already knows you don’t have a clue. He’s trying to vent. Let him. If acts as though you don’t face challenges everyday yourself or if he behaves as though you don’t have career goals of your own gently remind him that once in awhile you might want to tell him what’s on your mind. If you work outside the home remind him or if you’re a student bring up what’s going on at school. Just be sure you don’t change the subject right away. Often our spouses are trying to clear their heads if only we will let them. Let them. You may find his pay checks increase once he overcomes his limitations. This is a beautiful process to be apart of and allow him to be apart of your own career development. One day you’ll refer to these days of low pay as the early years. Be glad when the wheat starts to grow, but know you can’t change over night. Money takes time.
If his work offers extended training encourage him to be the first to sign up. Whether or not he signs up for what’s offered to him in terms of education will tell you a lot about his level of amibition. Sometimes in order to pave the road green we have to concentrate on the here and now. School today. Rich tomorrow.
For example, in the automotive repair business many dealerships offer extended training to keep their mechanics up to date on Chrylser, Ford and so on depending upon which company he works for. The best part of is that they usually pay the mechanics for a full day’s worth of training. Therefore ask your man if his company offers extended training. He should be first in line, because he can use his education, certificates,etc. as leverage in the work place. Any field involving technology might offer extended training; you’ll just have to find out. Make yourself useful to your man by offering suggestions, but you don’t have to be pushy. He already has a boss at work.
The number one thing men want is encouragement.. It’s not easy being a man today with all that’s expected of him as father, husband and professional person. Men are still expected to be tough and on top of things. One way to enourage his work place development is to literally get on top of him. A friend of mine told her husband no sex until he gets a job. Needless to say he’s still unemployed. Men need sex to bring out the inner apha male and yes, sometimes you do want to bring out the alpha male.
Orgasm relaxs a man. That’s why they go to sleep afterwards. When he’s getting “enough” the night before a busy day he’ll be better rested and ready to go for the big promotion. He’ll feel worthy of a higher pay check knowing how much his woman cares about his needs [this includes nurturing him in bed, not just a quickie].He’ll be motivated to do what he has to do to meet his family’s needs. Hey, ladies if he can’t even get the woman he married to “lay” with him in bed what reason does he have to believe he has what it takes to compete with co-workers who are making more than he is making right now?
Do make sure you both get enough rest. If you’re too tense you’ll argue more and less will get done even if you’re running around in circles; especially if you’re running around in circles. In order to focus on your responsibilites you’ll need to be well rested and calm. Many people get it all wrong by wearing themselves out.What good is all your money going to do you when you have to split everything in a messy divorce settlement? Think about getting some rest this weekend.
Good luck in money, life, love and everything in between. Work hard, take a break when you need one and encourage each other.