On Easter Sunday the kids will stuff their adorable little faces with candy until you threaten to hide it again, this time where no one will find it. The after Easter Sunday dilemma is what to do with all the leftover jelly beans, marshmallow peeps, Cadbury eggs and chocolate bunnies? You don’t want your kids to eat it all. You surely don’t want your slightly overweight husband to polish it off. You can’t possibly eat it yourself that would not set a good example. What to do, what to do…..
I have some suggestions:
You always find a few kids in the grocery store yelling and screaming for candy and their mom yells back “no candy I told you”. Make sure to take a few marshmallow peeps in a plastic bag, hidden in your purse, and when those kids start screaming hand them the marshmallow peeps. Don’t let the mom see you. They aren’t your kids, so what is they get a sugar high right before dinner.
Ever been to the drive-thru at the bank and the nice lady hands you lollipops for your kids and you have to tell them they can’t eat the candy until after dinner? Then they start screaming and crying and you can’t wait to get home and make them go in time out. Why not drop a nice half-melted, headless chocolate bunny in that deposit slot and smile politely as you drive away. One leftover bunny checked off the list.
Grab a bag of jellybeans and a few mini eggs and stash them in an unmarked brown paper bag in the pantry. When the school asks for donations for the food drive turn in that bag. Make sure your name isn’t on it, or any other identifying marks.
Remember the old trick where you put dog poop in a bag, set it on fire and rang the doorbell and watched the idiot in bare feet stomp on the bag? A better smelling rendition of that would be to put a melted bunny and a few Cadbury eggs in a bag and follow the rest of the instructions. The person who tries to put the fire out will be upset but at it won’t smell as bad as dog poop.
Don’t you have someone on your Christmas list who presents you with a fruitcake every year? Hum……what would be more fitting that to give that person a beautifully decorated box full of 8 month old jelly beans and a stale chocolate bunny or two?
Perhaps one of your coworkers is leaving the company and moving out of sate. Of course there will be a going away party. Candy makes a nice going away gift doesn’t it? You will never see that person again, so don’t worry about it.
By that point your Easter Sunday candy leftovers should be just about gone. It is okay if you still have one dark chocolate bunny hidden in the back cabinet. When no one is home grab that bunny and bite his ears off, then wipe the chocolate off your face and no one will be the wiser!
Happy Easter to all!